Deaconess Allison Jeong (CMM Christian Medical Mutual Aid Society, Needs Processing Department)
As a Gold Plus member of the CMM Christian Medical Mutual Aid Society, I was able to get a health checkup, so I had a breast cancer screening again this August. The results were normal, but I was advised that annual breast cancer screenings are important and should be done regularly.
However, on Saturday morning—four days before I was set to leave for the CMM staff training—I received a call from my doctor telling me that this time I needed to undergo two mammogram exams at a large hospital. Just as I was getting excited about preparing for the trip, my heart grew heavy, and I worried, “Why am I hearing this at this very moment?” So I prayed that God would speak to me through the Sunday service.
I urgently obtained my medical records and quickly made an appointment at the breast center of a large hospital for Tuesday. At the time, I thought to myself, “I shouldn’t look at my medical records in advance—the specialists will review them and treat me anyway, so I shouldn’t worry.”
On Tuesday morning, the specialists looked at my medical records and said that while the initial results were normal, the records from two weeks later indicated cancer. Since the records were inconsistent, they said they couldn’t perform an ultrasound or further tests at this time, so they asked me to wait while they checked with the hospital where the tests were done and would call me with the results.
The moment I heard the word “cancer,” I couldn’t accept it; I was so shocked that I couldn’t say a word. For a few seconds, I couldn’t even feel my feet touching the ground—I wasn’t sure if the reality before me was a dream or not. I went about my work while waiting for the call, but the reality was that I was busy preparing for a staff training session set to begin the next day. My mind went blank, and I found it difficult to express in my limited words what it truly meant to “entrust all my affairs to the Lord” or what that genuine heart felt like. I came to fully empathize with the feelings of those who are suffering and those in the same situation as me.
After lunch, I finally received a call from the number listed under the hospital’s name, but the person on the other end of the line told me that my test results had been recorded incorrectly due to a system error at the hospital where I’d been tested. Even though it was the good news I’d been waiting for, a moment later I wondered, “How could this have happened to me?” During those four days of waiting, as I prayed before God with the heart of one who was suffering, a small faith—that Jesus’s bearing of the cross was truly for me—descended from my mind into my heart.
“Thank You, God the Father.”
After that incident, God changed the way I saw things. Every single person I met became precious to me. The scenes I encountered moment by moment were so beautiful and precious. The next day, on the flight to Ramona with the staff training team, I looked out the window and thought, “Wow—the clouds and sunlight God created—all of this is a miracle and a blessing.” I wanted to raise both hands in the air and shout, “Oh God, this is amazing!”
Praise just flowed naturally from my lips, and since the two deacons traveling with me were a worship accompanist and a high soprano in the choir, I thought we made a perfect team. Ah! I earnestly hoped that Jehovah Jireh would grant us the opportunity to spend time praising and praying with these precious people during our training program.
On the first evening, we began singing hymns around the piano. “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Hallelujah! Everything within me, praise the Lord!” The staff training team and Pastor Park all sang in unison. We sang our hearts out in gratitude, losing track of time. As we praised God, the love and gratitude we shared with one another grew even deeper.
I was amazed by the countless stars in the pitch-black night sky over Ramona, at 2,400 feet above sea level, and by the feeling of those stars pouring down into my heart. Just before dawn, before the sun rose, the sight of the morning sun rising over the mountain peaks rising above the “sea of clouds”—a phenomenon I’d only heard about—was so dazzling that I couldn’t look directly at it.
Upon seeing this, the deacon remarked that this must be what the Bible meant when it says that those who see God will die. The pebbles, the cactus flowers—everything here, including us—is God’s creation, and it was by His grace that we became His children. He transformed our perspective, allowing us to see all the worries, anxieties, and desires of the world beneath our feet with eyes different from before.
As I toured the prayer centers and retreats, I found myself hoping that many of our members would visit these precious places to experience healing and rest. At the prayer center with the charred cross, I could distinctly feel the fervor of the prayers offered by those kneeling in supplication. As I walked along the winding path, turning my back on the world and climbing toward Ramona, I wondered if I still had further to go; but at Logos House—where I was even closer to God—I had moments to reflect on my own smallness and humility.
At the Logos Chapel service, where we pray for those who are sick, we would like to share God’s grace through worship, especially for the deacons undergoing cancer treatment and the “warriors of prayer” who are wrestling with their prayers on their own. Let us all unite our hearts to give glory to God through our praise.
Source: Christian Journal (https://www.kcjlogos.org)